Hi guys! Been away a while. I’ve been busy finishing the next novel, doing edits on the Animals screenplay and oh yeah, having a baby. I wrote a piece about the birth for The Pool and you can read it here. WARNING: it ain’t pretty.
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If only more women felt able to share how fucking awful things can be, we might all be a bit better prepared. Thank you, Emma Jane. Ending up with a truly broken fanny/arse was traumatising, bewildering and sent me under for a long time. I was the one at the NCT class reunion that couldn’t pretend it was all hearts and flowers, my baby just cried, a lot. Sorry did I say cry, I meant SCREAMED. I was physically and mentally scarred and it robbed me of what I can only guess should have been something quite nice (sitting on the sofa with chocolates, a cooing baby and The Sopranos box set). It was like a waking horror. It passed and they fixed me eventually. She stopped screaming and now that a good number of years has passed she even makes a cracking brew.
Wow! Congratulations. Hope all is well.
I’ve never left a comment on an article but I was intensely moved to do so today. Your birthing story really moved me. It was identical to mine. From the 3rd degree tear, 3 hour labour, bag of Brazil nuts, absolute terror and shock and horror. I also had an I pod play list (mine was called “Labour Dancing” which I never got to use along with the electric candles.) I didn’t feel guilty about the way I gave birth but I did feel a huge amount of pressure to just “get on with it” afterwards. The midwives made be feel like loosing 2 litres of blood wasn’t worth making a fuss about. I was horrified by the whole birthing process and j just simply didn’t feel like bouncing back. I ended up in hospital for 5 days and felt like I’d failed (not at the birth my son literally shot out) but at how I recovered. I failed at recovery!! What made your article extra special was the date of your birth. My sons birthday, November 8th 2015, was exactly one year before yours. Keep writing. Keep making people feel like they aren’t alone in their experiences. Thanks. Vicci-Lee
Hi Emma Jane. Just read your piece for The Pool, and you’re right, it wasn’t pretty, but as the husband of a midwife (mid-husband ?), a lot of it rang true. It reminded me of the description of a less than perfect stitching job that a doctor had performed. He said it was like when you button-up your cardigan wrong and you end up with an extra bit at the bottom…
When we were expecting our second baby – I say “our”, to be fair, my wife did most of the hard work – we decided on a water birth at home and went on a day’s course at the Pankhurst Suite. Apparently, the bath would be so relaxing, that no other pain relief would be needed. My scepticism proved to be justified… gas and air was the order of the day.
Really good to hear that you’ve got a healthy baby boy.
What’s the due-date for your third novel..?
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